tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-40484756789873797972024-03-05T16:17:35.959-08:00Pretty In Your FaceHow to be a plus-sized rock star in a galaxy of tiny dancers.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4048475678987379797.post-22347640591892583012014-08-02T22:48:00.001-07:002014-08-02T23:46:53.003-07:00Getting down to business.<br />
My Nana is not a fan of the Internet. Facebook, especially; she doesn’t see the purpose of sharing private and personal information where anyone and everyone can see it. Sometimes I see her point, but I am also a child of technology. It shaped my worldview: I found friends and solace in it, and even met my husband through the world wide web.<br />
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As such, I feel differently about sharing my life with strangers. I know that through sharing a part of me, others can reach out and offer solutions, and perhaps even I will help someone else along the way.<br />
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So. Fess up time.<br />
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I have an addiction. It is serious, and something I don’t talk about, but it keeps me up at night and is the reason for my self-loathing, and yet that very self-loathing leads me to use again and again instead of finding positive alternatives.<br />
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I’m talking about food.<br />
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Before you sigh with relief -- “Phew, Bri! You had me worried there!” -- don’t. Don’t roll your eyes or laugh and nod or say, “Oh we all do.”<br />
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No. no you don’t.<br />
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What separates me (and others like me) from you is that you don’t think about food all day. You do not think about where you will get your next fix, and what it will feel like, and what it will taste like, and who you’ll enjoy it with, and on and on and on. I eat and look forward to eating again. I love food, I need it, I crave it, and am unhappy without it. I think about it when I should be sleeping, or when I should be working. I need it to enjoy a television show. If we get in the car to go anywhere, I expect food to be involved, and am disappointed when it is not.<br />
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It is destroying me.<br />
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I am 5’10. I am 320 pounds. I noticed when writing that I didn’t say, “I weigh 320 pounds.” No, I AM this. I look in the mirror and see misshapen, deformed body parts, stretch marks like scars along my engorged belly and flabby arms, and nothing, nothing there is beautiful. My breasts hang like meat from racks and hold zero appeal to me. This object in the mirror is not a woman, but a thing, a sack of fat and organs.<br />
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And it’s because of my addiction.<br />
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This isn’t healthy thinking. I’m fully aware. But I’m also fully aware that I cannot embrace “body positive” agendas when I see what I see in the mirror.<br />
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I could walk every day - I’d feel better, healthier. I’d improve the quality of my life, and even my voice, which is my pride.<br />
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I have made other changes - I’m getting a different drink at Starbucks filled with much less sugar and calories, and I enjoy it. I adore veggies and make sure to add as many as possible to my dishes.<br />
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But I still crave more and more. The act of eating. The taste, the smell, the feel, it borders on obscene. And I have no idea how to stop it.<br />
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It’s not my only problem, of course. Exercise won’t automatically come just because I stop eating. I won’t get an amazing ‘beach body’ just because I suddenly hate food.<br />
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But this addiction is consuming, and when I even think about changing my eating habits and putting exercise into my daily routine, I instantly think of what foods I will have to leave behind.<br />
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I have PCOS. My doctor has plainly stated that I need to give up starches like potatoes and sugar. The sugar isn’t even as big a problem - I have found ways to shrink my sweet tooth. But potatoes, man. There is NOTHING that tastes like a potato. And burgers aren’t the same without fries. Every major holiday involves mashed potatoes. I live in freaking Idaho.<br />
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I’m getting off topic. Rather, I’m unsure where to go from here. I’ve admitted my problem, and that’s the first step right? That’s what they tell you. But they never tell you the second step. how do I FIX IT?<br />
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Where do I buy willpower? Where can I craft armor with +infinity WP?<br />
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In the USA, it is nearly impossible to eat well when you’re poor. Hubs and I ate our best when we were on food stamps/gov assistance. We could suddenly afford to spend 2 extra bucks on higher quality bread with no sugar or HFCS. I could experiment with whole grains and vegetables to replace my dear love of potatoes.<br />
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<br />
But without that assistance we grow lazy. Double cheeseburger for $1? Okay. Let’s get 2, or 3. Let’s get 4, and we’ll have food for later, and we spent less than $5 (Oh, that’s per person). Because the combination of sauces and pickles and meat and cheese is wonderful right now. Let’s forget about one hour later, when we’re bloated and greasy, and the bad cholesterol collecting in my arteries.<br />
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See? This is what an addiction is. A quick fix for a quick high, ignoring the consequences, damn the results.<br />
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I’m sure you’ve seen the photos of drug users, the mugshots. How they look the first time versus a few years later. The sores, the missing teeth, the bagging skin.<br />
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My before and after addiction photos have striking differences too. Maybe the health issues aren’t readily noticeable, but they should be. The morality, the right or wrong of my choices may not be as harshly debated, but I definitely am in the wrong, here. I could use the excuse of health problems - part of my ballooning weight began with the PCOS, I’m sure. But I was the one who went back for more plates of food. I craved more, and so I got more.<br />
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No accountability. I did this to me.<br />
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How do I fix it? How do I keep at it, when I grab a healthier snack option, or ride a bike for a few miles?<br />
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<br />
--<br />
<br />
I've been working on this blog post off and on since the end of March. My weight has gotten worse, my impulses have gone unchecked, and I'm feeling pretty dang low about it all. This post was supposed to encourage me and others, and yet I kept it hidden from all (including myself) and as such it's done nothing but take up space on my Google Drive. I wanted to revise it properly, fix strange leaps of thought and make proper segues.<br />
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But no, this is going in raw.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjo-ByDcMjUh_PhMrvz34HVE2kIgNEmchFEGC4BUe64byHwJ9Koccbes3toqfdh8PzyopCs9bcbZSpFQyEfrN-asd6w93jw6S15E2z1O5DUjQQsX2fVoZOdYhDbC5XkSC3ExKc9mH9bubRE/s1600/output_O4eb02.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjo-ByDcMjUh_PhMrvz34HVE2kIgNEmchFEGC4BUe64byHwJ9Koccbes3toqfdh8PzyopCs9bcbZSpFQyEfrN-asd6w93jw6S15E2z1O5DUjQQsX2fVoZOdYhDbC5XkSC3ExKc9mH9bubRE/s1600/output_O4eb02.gif" height="400" width="262" /></a>Because I found an image of myself tonight, from last year. Last year when I was smaller and yet still huge. True to the blog, I look "pretty in the face" -- if you ignore the strange lumps like tumors popping up here and there. Yes yes, everyone has wrinkles and rolls because no one is a walking Photoshop ad. But this isn't the same. And even with my poorgal's Photoshop (aka: MSPaint), I've 'slimmed' my image just a little, and boy oh boy does it look better.<br />
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Enough is enough. I must do something. Soon isn't soon enough. Tomorrow is too far away, even though I've got a random donut calling my name. Even though we'll be going to Seattle in a couple weeks. I wanna see 30, 40, 90, and it ain't gonna happen like this.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4048475678987379797.post-54268650008883256022013-09-13T20:56:00.001-07:002013-09-13T20:56:07.817-07:00Nerd Fitness!Short post here, as I am aware I've been slacking off regarding posting and I want to get this out there before I recommit.<br /><br />After a trip to <b>Kotaku </b>to see <a href="http://kotaku.com/in-case-you-needed-a-reminder-the-human-body-is-amazin-1310368082">an awesome video on how awesome we awesome humans are</a> (or can be), I found the link to <b><a href="http://www.nerdfitness.com/">Nerd Fitness</a></b> in the comments.<br /><br />It has made me hopeful.<br />
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I'm a fan of gaming. I won't call myself a full-on "gamer" because I don't game as often as some (but I do get obsessed with the few games I adore -- I'm currently in to <i>Guild Wars 2</i>). My nerd-cred is all over the place -- certain TV shows, book series, and games. Not to mention MUSIC.<br />
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That said, <b>Nerd Fitness</b> hits a spark within me that I'm hoping will light a fire under my 300-lb butt to get out there and do <i>something</i>. Especially after reading <a href="http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2013/07/11/the-cosplay-hero-how-anne-lost-100-lbs/">a story about a woman who lost 100 lbs to become healthier and rock some cosplay</a> :) She has a blog here: <a href="http://www.projectreroll.blogspot.com/">Project Reroll</a> and it's lovely! Please check her story out!<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4048475678987379797.post-44419232982744798432013-06-30T21:12:00.002-07:002013-06-30T21:18:44.944-07:00Plus-size Sale!<span style="font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px;"><b><a href="http://www.eloquii.com/">eloquii</a> </b>is a plus-size clothing store by <b>The Limited</b>. In May, <b>The Limited</b> announced they were phasing out this branch. As we plus-size gals already have limited (no pun intended) options for our clothing, this is of course a sad piece of news for us.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px;"><br />
</span></span> <span style="font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px;">On the plus side (I'm just full of unintentional puns today), I didn't know this place existed until a random ad popped up while I was researching a word ('tempted' if you must know). As such, I was thrilled at the sale. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px;"><br />
</span></span> <span style="font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px;">Clothing that was normally $60 and $80 I got for about $10 per piece. They've also cancelled their ground shipping fee regardless of the purchase size, so free shipping, AND an extra 15% for the closeout! I ended up buying 8 pieces (two tanks, two dresses, two pairs of jeans, leggings, and a skirt) for $80.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px;"><br />
</span></span> <span style="font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 17px;">Take advantage of this while you can, lovelies!</span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4048475678987379797.post-10114878937433713692013-05-05T15:57:00.005-07:002013-05-05T16:06:13.800-07:00A Random Assemblage of Goings-On Hello, lovelies! God has granted me with a full plate of late, and I am so very grateful for it! Here is a run-down of what's been happening lately with with this Rock Goddess:<br />
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<li><h3>
<span style="color: #444444;"><span style="background-color: cyan;">Netbook</span></span></h3>
</li>
</ul>
First of all, I'm writing this post from my 'new' netbook! I've been in the market for a notebook or netbook, and my BiL managed to hook me up with a very nice, hardly used HP Mini from a coworker. It's currently running Ubuntu, but once I and Hubster have read up more on various Linux distros (versions or 'distributions') I plan to install Mint.<br />
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The reasoning behind this is, mini-laptops have small processors as well. Beefy OS (like Vista or even Windows 7) will run slowly. Linux has quite a few lite-OS options. Ubuntu is one of them, but I've heard very good things about Mint as well -- mainly that it is like Ubuntu, but even more streamlined. And the best part? Linux is open-source. I am ALL about open-source :)<br />
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<li><h3>
<span style="color: #444444;"><span style="background-color: cyan;">Editing</span></span></h3>
</li>
</ul>
I've wanted my own laptop computer for mainly two reasons. One? I like surfing the net or writing in bed. I like to curl up against the wall and type type away. This was a little more cumbersome with our shared laptop, and recently it had become Hubs' work PC. I wanted something for <i>me</i>, that was <i>mine</i>. Two? Not only do I enjoy writing in bed, but as a freelance editor, I like spending work time comfortable as well.<br />
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I recently was introduced to Bri Clark, who is an alpha female when it comes to many aspects of her life, and she gave me some excellent advice on editing as a career. After our advice luncheon, she asked if I would edit her newest novel. I have done so, and look forward to her feedback. I also look forward to when she publishes her latest work so I can pimp it to my writer friends! The novel is chock full of great advice for new writers from the perspective of someone who's been there, done that, and come out on top.<br />
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Editing is something which comes naturally to me, one of two things about myself I have confidence in. Getting into the business isn't a cakewalk, however, and as I've posted before I need a job. That has been thankfully solved, at least until the end of May. I've been <b>substituting</b>! <br />
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<li><h3>
<span style="color: #444444;"><span style="background-color: cyan;">Substituting</span></span> </h3>
</li>
</ul>
Since mid-March I've been subbing full-time at a local elementary school. The work has been rewarding; I am an aide in the extended resource room (ERR). I work with autistic children, as well as others with mental or physical disabilities. Some days they just do <i>not</i> want to do this school thing, and I am right there with 'em! But I enjoy it, so very much. My fellow staff members are great with the kiddos and have been very welcoming to me, and I appreciate it very much.<br />
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Because of this, I have let my VocRehab case worker know I will pick back up with sessions after the school year. I have no idea what will happen next year: whether or not the elementary will need me full-time or what. But I just can't say enough how happy I am to go in to work everyday. Do I feel anxious? Yes, some. Do I dread getting up? Always. :D But I feel secure at the school (which is blessedly close to my house) and not overwhelmed like at my last job.<br />
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Also, since the school is only a mile away, I've walked home a few times. I don't do it often, but the Hubs and I share the car and sometimes he has to work late. The path home is peaceful, flat, and enjoyable. <i>Blessings I don't deserve... ^_^</i><br />
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<b>One other thing</b>: There's a bit of peer pressure in the working world. Did you know? Yes, and for me it has been: <u>eating habits</u>! The ladies (of various ages and body types) around me are eating tiny portions! With only 30 minutes to get in the lounge, nuke your food, and scarf it down before picking up kids, I can understand their choice of noms. But it has definitely made me rethink what I grab for lunch that day. Usually it's a Lean Cuisine-type meal, but if it's frozen, it needs to have a short cooking time. It needs to be something I can savor, because scarfing down 200 calories feels like filling up on packing peanuts. Sure I'm less hungry, but I'm not satisfied, nor do I feel like I had a time-out.<br />
<ul>
<li><h3>
<span style="color: #444444;"><span style="background-color: cyan;">Concert!</span></span> </h3>
</li>
</ul>
<b><a href="https://www.facebook.com/pages/Sever-The-Verge/426628084024197">Sever The Verge</a></b> had its second concert last night. It had been basically a year since we last played so we were stoked to get on stage again. Every dive is different, and the sound is usually <i>meh</i>. I am confident in my singing. I know I do it well. Unfortunately, if I can't <i>hear</i> myself, I worry I'm off by a half-step, so I tried to sing harder. This choked me up, and I sang about 2/3 of our first song, omitting the rest to try and swallow spit.<br />
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I kept looking to Hubs for clues as to how I was sounding, and he had a sympathetic twist to his lips. <i>I sound horrible</i>, I realized. There wasn't anything I could do; we both talked with the sound manager and he told me his monitors weren't the best. I was not going to be able to hear myself.<br />
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At the end of the show I placed my mic stand next to Hubs and said to a mutual friend, "Thanks for coming to our second and final show." It was a joke, but I was so sick at my stomach I felt like vomiting, and that is something I do. not. do. But I do <b>not</b> want to make StV look bad because of me! <br />
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After talking to a few other peeps who stuck around, however, I discovered I hadn't sounded bad at all. The problem was not my voice, but the fact that no one could hear it very well. When they <i>could</i> hear it, it was apparently awesome.<br />
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I immediately felt loads better. Sound issues like that are out of our hands -- we as a band did the best we could, and we rocked at it. That's all that matters.<br />
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I chatted with my fellow vocalist's neighbor for awhile and felt myself coming down from the show rush. I didn't fall asleep on the drive home, but only because it was short.<br />
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There is nothing quite like the sleep of adrenaline-crash. I got to bed around 2 am this morning, fairly positive I'd be too exhausted to move until 12 hours later. However, my alarm for church rang, I sat up to shut it off, and as I laid back down I realized, "Hey... I'm not sleepy. And I feel <b>rested</b>! I... I'm gonna get up! Yes! And get dressed and drive to church! YES!"<br />
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And so I did. Whether it was a nudge from God telling me "Really, Brianne, it's time," or a perfect alignment of body chemicals, I slept fantastically. I was still tired after church (and took a nap in the car after lunch with the Hubs and BiL), but I was just so very grateful to be blessed with a new day.<br />
<span style="color: #444444;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #444444;"><span style="background-color: cyan;"><b>Q: In what aspect of your life are you most confident? In what attribute do you take most pride, knowing it's use of this which makes you truly shine?</b></span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4048475678987379797.post-37951267444739818512013-03-02T16:48:00.002-08:002013-03-02T16:48:41.451-08:00Diet & Mental HealthI have not forgotten about PIYF, not at all. However, there's been little going on lately and I didn't want to fill a blog post with nothing but selfish ramblings (though, isn't that kinda what a blog is for?).<br /><br />First off, I haven't been keeping up with my calories. So girls (and guys), you aren't alone. You were working your tail off (so to speak), counting the calories in a cup of spinach, and then two or three days later you ate that giant Fuddrucker's burger with <i>both</i> pieces of the bun AND cheese and totally did <i>not</i> attempt to figure up the calories for it (or at least that's how it worked for me).<br /><br />Plus, you haven't been exercising (because you totally take the stairs when you go to the kitchen and band practice) and you're <i>surprised</i> you haven't budged on the scale. Because of that, you felt a little bad, and punished yourself with some brownie bites from Jack-In-The-Box two nights in a row...<br /><br />Yup, there's the wagon, driving away after I fell off it.<br />
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What's done is done, lovelies! You (read:<b> I</b>) made a mistake. Time to start again! We're gonna take a hint from the airlines and lose this baggage!!<br /><br />Here's a couple other things:<br /><br />I posted before regarding my job search. One $10 spring orientation and $40 background check later, I'm in the substitute pool for the local school district. Obviously not a full-time job, but that's good for me. I can set my own pace(-ish) and not feel overwhelmed. I've also began dialogue with Vocational Rehabilitation (VocRehab), starting just this past Wednesday. My caseworker put me in for a psych assessment (which is used to see if I qualify for VocRehab's services) on Thursday. The results of that will be in next week, and some time in the week after that I'll have another appointment with VocRehab to go over the results (including info from my general doctor).<br /><br />This is where the title comes in. I haven't done any research, so don't expect rampant fact-flinging. It's just fairly common sense that a better diet will equal better mental health. At the very least, one feels better about oneself if s/he has eaten well instead of scarfing down a giant fried entity larger than one's own stomach.<br /><br />I'm a rather anxious person (I think I've mentioned that before). I don't usually give credence to <i>alternative medicine</i>, but I will be looking up foods to help alleviate those negative feelings. I've never had a panic attack, for which I'm thankful, but the constant stress of a slowly winding gear which pulls me tighter and more highly strung until I'm 'confident' I will die is... well it's a downer. I don't accomplish anything, which makes me feel worthless, and the cycle begins again. My rational brain is telling me to get over these emotions and just <b>grow up</b>, but I can't. I hide in bed, in sleep, in dreams, and absolutely dread everything not sleep-related.<br /><br />We're gonna fix that. Starting with this evaluation, it is my hope we can move forward by getting me a counselor to talk with regarding these feelings, someone knowledgeable, non-judgmental, with whom I'm comfortable.<br /><br />Meanwhile, I need to remember that eating right isn't <i>just</i> about looking good, but about <i>feeling</i> good. And I need to <b>want</b> it (more than I apparently do now). Exercise will help with mental health as well. You've probably heard that. I've heard it most of my life. Now to put it in motion. A simple walk each night, now that it's warming up. Maybe the Hubs will go with me; maybe he won't. Gotta do it. Gotta do it for <b>me</b>.<br /><br />As an aside, I've been reading about food for vocal health as well. I plan to write a post dedicated to that in the near future.<br /><br />
<span style="color: #444444;"><span style="background-color: cyan;"><b>Why do you <u>really</u> want to get healthy? What, to you, is more important than food?</b></span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4048475678987379797.post-20563272271443248052013-01-28T20:59:00.001-08:002013-01-28T20:59:47.248-08:00:: motivation ::I've been keeping track of my calories these past few days, even though I haven't posted them (*looks* wow, it <i>has </i>been awhile). Between the laptop and my desktop I'm unsure which days are which, but I made <i>sure</i> I was under 2500 Calories, and tended to stay around 2000.<br /><br />Yesterday I ordered pizza. Here's what the day turned into:<br />
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<b>Breakfast:</b><br />
Cereal: <i>320</i><br />
<br />
<b>Lunch:</b><br />
Pizza (3 slices): <i>900</i><br />
<br />
<b>Dinner:</b><br />
Pizza (2 slices): <i>620</i><br />
<br />
<b>Snacks:</b><br />
1 Rice cake: <i>50</i><br />
1 TBSP PB: <i>80</i><br />
1 TBSP GJ: <i>10</i><br />
Milk: <i>90</i><br />
<br />
Cheese: <i>110</i><br />
Meat: <i>100</i><br />
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<b><i>Total: 2280</i></b><br />
<b><i><br /></i></b>
We also went to <b><a href="http://www.mauiwowi.com/">Maui Wowi</a> </b>for smoothies two days in a row, and the 20 oz. Hawaiian Breeze I drank was 357 Calories so I'm fairly pleased with that.<br /><br />But that's not what I'm writing this post about. Through some twisted trail of YouTube magic, I ended up watching an episode of <b><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Supersize_vs_Superskinny">Supersize vs Superskinny</a>. </b>And now I'm in a bit of delirium.<br />
<a name='more'></a><br /><br />
If you haven't seen the show (which airs and primarily takes place in the UK but focuses on the US as well), I will warn you first that the episode I watched included some shock tactics (showing severe results from obesity and bad eating habits). Though a doctor is present on the show, it is obviously made for viewers and not just a documentary, so one segment shows a super-sized person and his/her superskinny partner switching meals and seeing how they each deal with the new food portions and tastes. But it isn't simply a show meant to amuse. It is a show meant to wake us up.<br />
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"Outsized" caskets are now being sold. The ones shown in the episode I watched could hold three (assumedly averaged-sized) people, and can take up 2-3 burial plots. In 1990, this industry didn't even exist.<br /><br />As tasty as my pizza is, or those nachos are... such foods are slowly killing me. That's not to say moderation isn't key. I didn't glom down a whole large pizza, and chose thin crust instead of pan or stuffed. But I <i style="font-weight: bold;">must</i> change my eating habits or I may not even <i>have</i> children, much less live to see them grow into adulthood.<br /><br />I've been doing better in that department. I'm staying under 2500 Calories (and hoping to average around 2000 C daily), and not eating as much junk (though I've had donuts and diet soda, which I'd like to end up being 'special occasion' luxuries). Now I need to work on exercise.<br /><br />I have a YouTube playlist with a few workout videos I plan to begin soon, once I find a good space to use. I've also considered using the barn porch when it gets warmer -- I'll set up the laptop on a desk and utilize the space and fresh air (and privacy fence :)). This just to break up the monotony of walking for 30 mins. The key and bottom line: <u><i>I must start moving.</i></u><br /><br /><b><span style="background-color: cyan; color: #4c1130;">What is your favorite exercise? Something you do, even if nothing else goes right that day. A walk? Pick-up sports game? Maybe bike riding?</span></b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4048475678987379797.post-40030431557100944342013-01-23T23:28:00.000-08:002013-01-23T23:28:02.638-08:00To Become an AdultI haven't had a true job in forever.<br />
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The last job I had (June 2012), lasted one week before I had to quit. Such a severe bout of anxiety came over me that I lost nearly 10 lbs from loss of appetite. I didn't sleep well, and felt like a husk.<br /><br />Since that time, I've come to regret badgering my husband to the point he felt he needed to call my employers and quit for me. It's possible -- probable, even -- that I would have gotten over the fear I felt winding up in my head and stomach while I was on-the-clock. I'll never know, at least in that situation.<br />
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Due to our lack of finances, however, I <i>must</i> get a better job than the part-time work I have online. Tasks are not always available and I have a less than stellar willpower to continually check for work. As such, I needed to look for work in the real world.<br />
<br />
I started today, having lit upon the idea of child-care, but there was none in this area. I remembered substitute teaching, as I had done that when in AR and loved it. I pushed down my fears and applied. Now... now I wait.<br />
<br />
In the meantime, here is my food count for the day:<br /><br />
<b>Lunch</b>:<br />
Tortilla (2): 160 C<br />
Meat (3 TBS): 100 C<br />
Cheese (1.5 slices): 75 C<br />
Sour cream (2 TBS): 20 C<br />
Refried beans (black, low fat): 110 C<br />
Tomato (Roma): 35 C<br />
<br />
Donut: 310 C<br />
Milk: 90<br />
<br />
<b>Dinner</b>:<br />
Pizza: 640<br />
Yogurt: 90<br />
<br />
Yogurt: 80<br />
Carrot mix: 150<br />
String-cheese: 50<br />
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<b>Total: 1910</b><br />
<br /><br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4048475678987379797.post-6153920653771609562013-01-22T16:49:00.000-08:002013-01-22T23:47:53.941-08:00Hi, I'm Bri and I'm a sushi addict.Yesterday was band practice. Due to life being all life-y at me, I ended up not eating lunch until after I got to our drummer's house (ie: practice space). It was a small frozen noodle meal paired with a can of tuna, and while tasty and low-cal, I was hungry when I got home. Suddenly, one bowl of cereal turned into two, plus two roll-ups of Havarti cheese and lunch meat. I still had less than 2500 Calories, but I learned I need to plan a little better to insure I have filling meals so I don't mindlessly snack.<br />
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Today I had a doctor's appointment. I updated her on my new inspiration and that I was limiting myself to 2500 Calories a day (and had stayed under that so far). She was happy with this, though she asked why I hadn't continued to lose since my initial 30-lb drop. I continued talking with her about my current living situation, and how stressful it's become for the Hubs and myself. She nodded and explained emotions mess with everything (obviously). When one part of our well-being is out of whack, <i>the entire body</i> is out of whack. Long story short, I'll be looking into a therapist soon to help guide me to better myself. Doc also told me one burns more calories in the winter because our bodies need to heat up when we're outside, so walking outside is a bonus. So... I'll need to do that, even in the <i>FIVE DEGREE</i> weather we're having >_<<br />
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Meanwhile, Hubster wanted sushi after my appointment. A local chain grocer has some tasty sushi so I popped in to see their selection. I'm pleased that they offer brown rice sushi as well, though the selection isn't usually as wide. I asked the woman at the counter if she could make other items with brown rice and she said she could, if told in advance. She makes all her brown rice items in the morning (I assume because it's not as popular as white rice), but has return customers who call in and request it on certain days every week. She pointed out some flyers with a few examples of their offered sushi, so I've taken them to get familiar with what they have.<br />
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In the end I grabbed a Chef's Sampler for Andrew, as it had what appeared to be the best selection of salmon (which he'll eat raw if given the chance), a brown rice Spicy California Roll for myself, and we split a Hawaiian Roll (which had 12 pieces total). After looking up the foods online and doing a little over-estimation, and adding in the small amounts of sriracha, soy sauce, and soda I had, I ended up with a <650 lunch (that is, without the dessert I almost forgot I ate! Gotta write things down immediately!). Rather happy that I can keep eating sushi!!<br />
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**<br />
<br />
It's the end of the day, and I've had a late dinner. I felt it important to show the total of my day.<br />
<br />
<b>Breakfast</b><br />
Cereal: 360<br />
Skim Milk: 90<br />
<br />
<b>Lunch</b><br />
Soy Sauce (2 TB): 20<br />
Sriracha: 5<br />
Spicy CA: 286<br />
Hawaiian roll: 300<br />
Soda: 20<br />
Donut: 310<br />
<br />
<b>Dinner</b><br />
Tortillas: 160<br />
Sour cream: 20<br />
Salsa: 5<br />
Black Beans: 110<br />
Cheese: 110<br />
Taco Meat: 100*<br />
<br />
<b>Total:</b> <i><b>1896 Calories</b></i><br />
<i><b><br /></b></i>
* Until I get a food scale, I can only go by generic internet nutrition guides. I had 3 Tbs of taco meat, and of the few sources I found, most had less than 100 Calories for 1/4 cup (or 4 Tbs). I rounded up to account for the fat-to-meat ratio (which I don't know) and any 'secrets' in the seasoning.<br />
<br />
<strike><b>If</b> I have a snack before bed, it will be a donut (310) and some milk (90). That will be 400 extra calories to what I have, still putting me under my 2500 daily goal (at 2296 Cals). I mostly am putting this here so I don't have to amend it later if I do in fact snack on that very tempting donut.</strike> I ended up going with the BiL to Burger King and getting a medium caramel frappe without whipped cream. That's somewhere under 500 calories (and as such, under my goal) but I'm unsure how much. No, I didn't need it. I'm still learning to control such urges.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4048475678987379797.post-72097144070022186602013-01-20T22:45:00.001-08:002013-01-20T22:49:47.710-08:00Singapore Noodles!<b id="internal-source-marker_0.7266136161051691" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Today was the first day I had a hard time. Not with cravings, necessarily, but with what I would be eating. The past two days we’ve gone out with Ricky and with a little research (made much easier thanks to smartphones and tablets), I’ve been able to figure out food options fairly easily. But today I was at home, and I wanted something quick. I </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">didn’t</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> want a donut, because while I could figure in those calories later in the day, having one for breakfast would not be satisfying.</span></b><br />
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.7266136161051691" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">We woke up around noon. Yesterday our heater (unbeknownst to us) reset in a power flicker and we returned to an approximately 40° room. I slept in two long-sleeve shirts, a pair of sweatpants, two pairs of socks, under a comforter and an electric throw (Hubs had his own). We basically hibernated.</span></b><br />
<b id="internal-source-marker_0.7266136161051691"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></b><br />
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.7266136161051691"><b id="internal-source-marker_0.7266136161051691"><span style="font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline;">Needless to say, waking up to temperatures that didn’t get above 20° meant we weren’t going anywhere to buy food (even though I planned to get groceries at some point). I remembered my soup drawer, found a can of light chicken soup with brown rice, and had it with a few black bean tortilla chips. Donut for dessert.</span></b></b></div>
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<b id="internal-source-marker_0.7266136161051691"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then I honestly just put off eating. It was in the back of my mind constantly, but I knew I’d have to cook and I did </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">not</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> want to deal with rummaging for foods that would go well together </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">and</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> calorie-counting. In fact, in opening the freezer to see if I had any Lean Cuisine meals left, I instead stood staring at two bags of horrible-for-you frozen burritos. Again, knew that wouldn’t be filling, even if it was quick.<br class="kix-line-break" /><br class="kix-line-break" />Internet to the rescue!! I bought some <a href="http://www.anniechun.com/node/851">fabulous noodles</a> at</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> Whole Foods</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> a couple days ago (that was a trip! We’d never been to WF before) and remembered this evening that I had seen at least one good recipe for them. While checking through the recipe’s instructions and item list, I mentally went though what foods I had available to substitute. What resulted was probably the best Asian-inspired noodle dish I’ve ever made. A super special <i><u>Thank You!</u></i></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> to </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Beth </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">at <a href="http://budgetbytes.blogspot.com/2010/09/singapore-noodles-840-recipe-140.html">Budget Bytes</a> </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">for the inspiration!</span><b id="internal-source-marker_0.7266136161051691"><span style="vertical-align: baseline;"></span></b></span></b><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b><span style="vertical-align: baseline;">"Sorta" Singapore Noodles<span style="font-weight: normal;"><br /></span></span></b></span></b><br />
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<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="vertical-align: baseline;">Veggies (I used one cup of each):</span></b></span></b><br />
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Spinach - 7 Calories</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Squash (yellow and zucchini, frozen) - 30 Cal</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Green beans (frozen) - 35 Cal<br class="kix-line-break" />Broccoli (frozen) - 30 Cal</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Chicken (about 4 oz) - 110 Cal<br class="kix-line-break" /><br class="kix-line-break" />Maifun brown rice noodles (200 Cals a serving; as I hadn’t had much to eat I went for two servings, or 400 Cal)</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Seasonings:<br class="kix-line-break" />Mrs. Dash </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Onion & Herb</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> - 0 Cal</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Worcestershire sauce (2 tsp) - 10 Cal </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Soy sauce (1 tbsp) - 10 Cal</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Oyster sauce (1 tbsp) - 25 Cal</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Olive oil (2 tbsp, divided) - 240 Cal</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Sriracha sauce - 5 Cal (I just used a few dashes, which I figure roughly equaled the 1 tsp serving)</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Okay, so did I mention this was </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">easy</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">?? I really didn’t want to make anything, mostly because I’m lazy but also because I hadn’t planned this, so I worried it wouldn’t turn out remotely close to what I thought it should taste like. But these blessed, blessed noodles are NO FUSS, especially for stir-fry. You simply submerge them in warm water and just </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">leave ‘em </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">for 6-8 minutes. This left me time to focus on other things, like measuring out frozen vegetables while my frozen chicken breast was defrosting in the nuker.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">This is also where I messed up, just a bit. Once my chicken was thawed I thinly sliced it and sprinkled some Mrs. Dash over the top, then added a tablespoon of olive oil. I mixed that just a bit with my hands and let it sit while I microwaved my veggies (they were still frosted with ice, which I left, as it’s recommended to put some water in with them to steam) so they weren’t frozen when I sauteed them. And that’s when I realized I would need more olive oil. Given the amount of calories in the oil, I’d hoped to just use the one tablespoon and be done with it. But I couldn’t cook the chicken at the same time as my veggies, since the cooking times varied. So with a sigh I got down the olive oil and poured another tablespoon in the skillet, heating it to medium before adding the vegetables. This is when I also added my Worcestershire sauce, soy, and oyster sauce.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I let that saute for a bit while I strained my noodles and wandered around with my head screws loose because I never know what I’m doing in the kitchen and was pleasantly surprised that I had not yet burned anything. Then I put the veggies to the side, keeping the water+sauce+oil in the skillet. The thin slices of chicken cooked </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">fast, </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">and then the magic happened. This is the moment I fell in love with this dish. I put my noodles in the skillet (after giving a rough chop so they’d stir-fry well) and they </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">immediately</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> absorbed the sauce. They absorbed it so fast I thought I’d done something wrong, and worried I’d need more liquid or my food would be too dry.</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">After tossing the noodles with a pair of tongs and adding the veggies back in, I dashed in some sriracha and let the mix incorporate on its own before pouring it out onto a plate. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Darn</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">, I’d let some of the noodles stick. I gently scraped them from the pan and took a tentative taste. Holy mother was that fantastic. Slightly crunchy, full of flavor, and what a great texture! These are things cooks know, or even the random person who makes dinner more than once a month. I’m not ignorant when it comes to cooking, but I felt sure they’d end up tasting burnt or being hard. Thaaaat was pretty much my favorite part of the dish. </span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">And let me tell you, there was a lot of favorite to be had. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> full of flavorful goodness, and I know it wasn’t junky, bad-for-me burritos. I also know for next time </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">not</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> to put olive oil on the chicken, as there will be plenty of liquid from the vegetables and sauce. I’ll also probably leave out the green beans and add an extra half-cup each of squash and broccoli, as I really love those veggies. Lastly, I used spinach from a bag of wilting salad mix (which also had a few matchstick carrots to add in). This, like so many stir-fry or fried rice dishes, would be a great way to get rid of random foods in your fridge.<br class="kix-line-break" /></span></b><br />
<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I spoiled myself and ate another donut, because it was </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-style: italic; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">there</span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. These donuts will do me a lot more good once they’re gone. Even so, I still ended under 2000 Calories for the day (1852 Cals).</span></b><br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4048475678987379797.post-86167054793570376802013-01-19T22:01:00.002-08:002013-01-19T22:01:08.985-08:00Day at the Museum!<span id="internal-source-marker_0.5374952391721308"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Stayed in bed as long as possible. When it's </span><b>9°F</b> outside, no one wants to go anywhere. I mean really. But I finally got up around 10:30-11 am, and after getting dressed <a class="g-profile" href="http://plus.google.com/106077982893131787565" target="_blank">+Andrew</a> (Hubs)</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">, <a class="g-profile" href="http://plus.google.com/104625705372363165747" target="_blank">+Richard Chason II</a> (BiL), and I all went to Starbucks. I had the same breakfast I had yesterday (when I actually started counting calories): oatmeal and coffee. I cut out the half & half and instead went for a sampler cup of whole milk. I used to hate oatmeal, but for the past year or so I've grown very fond of it, especially when I'm able to add in apples. A few days ago, Hubs even commented:</span><br />
<span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">
A: "I thought you hated raisins?"
B: "Well, I hated oatmeal too. But they go great together."
</span>BiL wanted to go to the <b>Boise Art Museum</b>, so I asked to stop in Walmart and buy some healthy snack foods. For whatever reason, my heart (and tongue) was set on carrots. I grabbed two bags of baby carrots; a small box of seasoned, crumbled feta; and a large bag of lightly salted almonds, plus a box of sandwich bags to stuff my snacky-snacks in.</span></span><br />
<span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></span>
<span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">On the way to <b>BAM</b> I assembled little ~150-Calorie bags and stuck them in my pockets, intending to munch away at feta-seasoned carrots and almonds while walking through the museum. Unfortunately, as soon as we walked in the door we were politely told no water was allowed (Hubs and I had brought our cups from Starbucks) and allowed to place them on a counter to pick up when we left. I put my coat back in the car so there would be no hint at funny business.</span></span><br />
<span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span></span><br />
<a name='more'></a><span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I fancy myself not-too-shabby in the artistic department. I write (some days more than others), and sketch when I can. I've never considered myself and <b>artist</b>, but I know what I like and dislike.
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<span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There were some thought-provoking pieces at <b>BAM</b>, but <i>wow</i> some of the items felt so arrogantly boring I was irritated. Currently a piece titled 'White Elephants' is displayed, and I liked it. One is able to walk among the true-to-scale elephants, inflated and made from parachute material. Massive creatures. We also watched a film regarding the creation of one of the glass vases in their pottery & glassware exhibit. I was definitely much more appreciative after seeing the literal sweat which goes into making the glass-blown vase (and that craft interests me, regardless).</span></span><br />
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<span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The rest of our time was spent waxing poetic about how I could create a piece of 'art' in 367 days from the sweat of my feet, representing each step I traveled in that allotted time, and lightly arguing over how I could accomplish such a thing. This was pretty much ended with Hubs commenting that I could just <i>not</i> do any of that but say I did. It was time to go.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">After leaving </span><b style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">BAM</b><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">, we stopped at the truck and I snacked away for a bit before we walked across the street to the </span><b style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Idaho State Historical Museum</b><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">. I had a </span><i style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">much</i><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;"> better time there. Seeing authentic, historical tools (from atlatls to arrows to irons to saws) was exciting. The intricate bead- and quillwork done by Idaho's native peoples especially grabbed my attention. While the beading is beautiful and still brightly colorful, I found the quillwork more impressive because porcupine quills are used, dyed with natural pigments from flowers and nuts. This art form quickly lost favor with the tribes when Europeans began trading beads with them. Still lots of work, but it looks so modern compared to the rustic weaving of the quills.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Several different taxidermied animals were displayed, including three different birds prior-to unknown and discovered by Lewis and Clark. Rooms modeled after home aspects in the late 1800s/early 1900s were visible, including my favorite: the "thunder mug"! Yes, that's another name for <i>chamber pot</i>, and it cracked my immature self up. Because Idaho is also a center for Chinese immigration during that time, there was a mock Chinese herb shop and a case of Chinese gambling items.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">By the time we finished (right as the museum was closing), we were ready to eat. BiL headed to <b>The Ram</b> (where I'd never been) and after much deliberation I finally decided on a patty melt without 1000 Island dressing, subbing in tomatoes instead. I fully intended to store half the sandwich in a to-go box and bring it home for later, but after taking a bite I knew I'd eat it all there. I ordered oven-roasted veggies (a medley of chopped red & green peppers, red & white onions, mushrooms, and zucchini) in of fries, and as usual stuck with water.
</span></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Hubs and BiL ordered steaks and were fairly pleased with how they turned out. </span><span style="font-family: Arial;"><span style="font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">I </span></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">love caramelized onions. These were not that. I'm unsure if they just weren't roasted long enough, or if when one roasts the onions never exactly soften, but the veggies were a bit too raw for my liking so I only ate half of them (making sure to pick out the few pieces of zucchini and mushroom). But our waitress was very proactive and due to a problem with Hubs' soup he was given his meal for free. I found them accommodating and the atmosphere was pleasant, even for a Saturday night.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Then we realized we wanted dessert. The prices were a bit much for BiL's tastes, and then he thought of <b>Krispy Kreme</b>. Oh, oh dear. I used his tablet to figure up the calories I'd eaten throughout the day and look up Krispy Kreme's nutritional info. I decided I could buy two donuts, enjoy one at the store and bring the other home. Of course, that's never how it happens. One of the servers handed us a fresh donut shortly after we walked in, and it was so, so good. Then Hubs asked me if we should buy an assorted dozen to eat throughout the week. I should have said no. I <i>could have</i> said no. But I said "Sure," and picked out six. THEN I ate one of those while sitting at the table!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">Those were easily the worst, emptiest calories I had all day. But they were tasty, and as you can see with my count, I still ended up well below my self-imposed 2500 Calories for the day.</span><br />
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</span><b>Breakfast:</b><br class="kix-line-break" />Oatmeal: 400 C</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Coffee (plus 4 oz whole milk): 78 C<br class="kix-line-break" /><br class="kix-line-break" /><b>Snack:</b><br class="kix-line-break" />Carrots: 35 C<br class="kix-line-break" />Almonds: 71 C</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Feta: 50 C<br class="kix-line-break" /><br class="kix-line-break" /><b>Dinner:</b><br class="kix-line-break" />Patty Melt: 700 C<br class="kix-line-break" />Oven-roasted Veggies: 50 C*</span></span><br />
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<span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b>Dessert:</b><br class="kix-line-break" />Donuts (one glazed, one apple-filled) : 480 C</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">2% Milk (about 4 oz): 56 C</span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b>Total:</b></span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> <u>1920 C</u></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"></span><br /><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">*didn’t eat all veggies, and information is hard to find regarding calories for 8 pieces of chopped onion ;)</span></span><br />
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<span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 15px; font-weight: normal; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The biggest issue I've run into in the past 48 hours involves approximations in calories. It has been strongly suggested that I invest in a food scale, and once I save up I intend to do just that. I'll also start preparing meals to freeze, so I can simply pop one in the nuker when family dinner looks too calorie-laden. One day, one meal at a time, ladies!</span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4048475678987379797.post-53591513083203099642013-01-18T21:49:00.002-08:002013-01-18T21:49:31.659-08:00Intro and ExplanationA good buddy of mine has been kind enough to chat at me regarding my want to lose weight and get healthy. We had similar interests in high school and I kinda think of him as a (slightly) younger brother. I have appreciated so much that he was willing to take time out of his life (wife, baby, another on the way, full-time job) to give me direction and encouragement. Thanks again, Robbie!
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As such, I'll be chronicling my health journey here. This means at least once a week I'll be posting my progress (probably Wednesdays): meal plan, any weight/inch loss, ups and downs. I decided to start a blog to better myself, really. I want it to be personal, but helpful to others out there like myself (specifically the <i>"I'm a fat girl but I wanna rock people's faces off!!"</i> crowd). Also, for the record, <b>I'm a fat girl.</b> I don't use that as an insult. It's what I am. When I go shopping, I tell the hubs I'm headed to the Fat Girl Clothes, and we often refer to ourselves as <b>Fats</b>, <b>Fatties</b>, or <b>Big'Uns</b>. If you for whatever reason find that offensive, then A] You must not have known me very long, and B] I don't see a reason for you to be sensitive regarding what I call myself.
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Even when I lose weight, I will always be "plus-sized". When I was in high school I weighed around 180 lbs at 5'10, and my pants size was 14. Had I actually done any exercise and watched my eating habits, that number might have fluctuated but more importantly my body would have been more fit, though I'd still have been plus-sized. For the current fashion world, anything 14+ (and sometimes anything <i>12+</i>) is considered plus-sized. Ridiculous? Sure, especially when you see the images of those women, and realize they aren't obese, but simply average (I can understand the "plus" coming in around 18/20, which some label as XL).
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I say all that to say, don't get offended. If you're fat, you're fat. I'm not saying it as a bad thing. The bad part is if you're unhealthy, and that's what I'm looking to change. I'll never be a stick, and I'm fine with that. I know there are women who wish they could gain weight, and while that is something bigger women often laugh about and mutter how we'd love to be in their shoes, the world is hard on them, too.
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Aaanyway, that's a bit of insight into what I plan on doing from now on. Starting out simple and working my way forward, one day, one meal at a time.
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04066033522928930797noreply@blogger.com0